Since having a baby, there's been lots of occasions where I've felt like people think I'm being very rude, and to be completely honest, I'm not, I'm just putting my child first.
Take yesterday for example - we arrived at a notoriously busy lift in St Davids 2 here in Cardiff, there was one middle-aged couple waiting too. As we arrived, the lift dinged. The other couple very quickly darted across in front of us, ensuring their place in the lift. Yes, they were there first, but was that polite? I was brought up to always let people who are older, or with prams, or in a wheelchair etc, go first, whether that's onto a bus, on a train, through a door or in a lift. It's simple manners. Yes I'm able bodied - but I've lost count of the amount of times at that specific lift, I've had countless people push in front of me, leaving me not able to get the pram in the lift, and I've been there waiting for 20 mins trying to get on a lift as no one would let me on - I ended up giving up on trying to get to those shops on the next level up.
I'll give you another example. When I'm walking down the road with the pushchair, I walk on the side of the pavement that's farthest from the road, so hugging the houses. I will not move out of the way if you're walking towards me. My child is the most important thing in my life and I will do everything I can to protect him - if that means putting someone's nose out of joint because I won't push him into the traffic, well so be it, or letting someone think I'm being rude, fine. Countless times recently I've encountered some very nasty looks from people who refused to move and in fairness, it's not their fault. Before having Squidge, it never would have crossed my mind to move to the outside of the pavement for a pram, but now I get it. Just last week I was walking home, and a couple were walking towards me with their dog, they walked single file hugging the wall to give me room to get past, which was nice, but again, that would be me pushing my child towards the traffic - not going to happen - as a result I received some disgusting looks for barely moving out of their way.
Am I the only one that does this? I certainly get out of the way of prams now when I'm out and about now that I've had a child myself.
Hopefully if you're reading this and have always wondered why people with prams might not move out of the way, you'll know it's not because we're being rude or arrogant, it's because we're trying to protect the most precious thing in our lives, our children.
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Totally agree with this. I hate when people who are perfectly capable of taking the escalators / stairs take the lifts too so those with prams have to wait! I can't help but throw them a nasty glare! Oh and the people who park on the pavement so you have to go all the way around into the road with the pram get me pretty angry, too! Lyd x
ReplyDeleteelectricSUEDE
Yes, yes, yes!!! The car thing drives me nuts! Soon as Squidge is asleep I'm going to edit this post and include a bit about that - I have pics of a repeat offender when it comes to parking across the entire pavement! Thanks for the comment :)
ReplyDeleteGah totally agree with this! When teenagers pile into the lift when the escaltor is right next door, or when a whole pile of them walk straight towards my pram without even thinking about moving... I have almost run so many of them over haha xx
ReplyDeleteIt's just bad manners isn't it? But on the flipside, I had no idea until I'd had a baby :)
ReplyDeleteSome people can be just rude, i would ignore them. When i'm out and about i've never had a problem with letting people with strollers past first or them coming past me. As a pedestrian its cyclists that seem to be the problem. They ride on pavements all the time and most of the time you don't know they're behind you until they shoot past. The majority of them have no respect for other road users. Did you see that one who was caught on camera knocking a kid down on a pavement. He was going too fast, had no right to be on the pavement and worst of all didn't stop to check the girl was alright x
ReplyDeleteYeah I hate it when cyclists are on the pavement it drives me nuts! Like you said, you could step to one side for something and be taken out by one flying past when they shouldn't be there in the first place! Wow I didn't see that, how terrible! I hope the kid was ok :(
ReplyDeleteI think you're doing pretty well these days if you get any acknowledgement from anyone. It's every man for themselves. Hate cyclists on pavements. It's illegal for a start. To be honest though, before I had kids, women with prams used to drive me nuts - especially those who don't pay attention to their pram wheels and push it into your ankles. I think you just have to stand your ground and not expect too much from others. Bit like driving a car really!
ReplyDeleteI've always let wheelchairs, pushchairs, walking young children and animals go on the inside of the pavement as I pass. When I had the double buggy with a buggy board (as well as a walking child!) it was so slow to manoevure that I had to "stay in lane" even if I wasn't the highest priority lol. I'd just stop, pull in and apologise to everyone. (I don't miss those days! ;-) ) However, with a pushchair or stroller I will go on the outside (as long as it's safe) to let walking children, other pushchairs and small dogs etc pass safely. Able adults on their own should always go around though! We get funny looks for using the lift sometimes as my sister's stroke and Danny's heart condition can be invisible to others but generally I find more people are friendly and helpful than not which is heartening in this day and age. :-) xxx (those St Davids lift queues are a nightmare aren't they?!)
ReplyDeleteYes I too will let other buggies go on the inside or kids and people with kids (they can be more unruly!). I must admit, I won't budge for dogs though - I understand from the dog owners side, they are worried their dog will jump into the traffic, but realistically should be kept on a short leash - and in the grand scheme of things, my baby is more important than their dog :) Even though I'm not sure most people would see it that way :)
ReplyDeleteAargh, don't get me started on the lifts in SD2!!! Well, any lift for that matter. It infuriates me when people who are perfectly able to walk up the stairs, or take the escalator, will just stand there and wait for the lift, then step in front of elderly people, wheelchairs and prams. If I'm out shopping without the pram (which never happens!), I love being able to take the stairs.
ReplyDeleteThose lifts in St David's 2 are a nightmare! I can't believe when they made such a huge shopping centre they didn't put more in. It's so frustrating, especially as people need them for the car parks too.
ReplyDeleteIt is difficult getting about with a double buggy sometimes, but I tend to stop and let people go past, as it's quite heavy to move out of the way - but what winds me up is people who walk down the middle of the pavement so you can't get past them on either side. Really winds me up!
This post made me smile. I'm completely in two minds about it to be honest. I agree with your reasons completely - and I know I'll feel exactly the same in 8 wks time when my baby is here! Also, anyone with any manners at all should be aware of mothers, wheelchair users, elderly people - manners are the hallmark of civilised society. So people not letting you in the lift is just disgraceful! On the other hand though, you do get some mothers who are just rude and oblivious themselves, block everything or bang into you with their prams without an ‘excuse me’, don’t say thank you when you do let them past or whatever and just act extremely entitled! At which I will admit a part of me is like ‘I didn’t tell you to get pregnant, that’s your problem!’ so kind of in both camps really! I think overall its more to do with society as a whole being more selfish and a lot of people losing touch with good values in general – unfortunately that shows itself more in cases like this. Great post!
ReplyDeleteSarah | www.seriouslymummy.co.uk
Yeah I've had 2 different opinions on this, one before Squidge and one after - it's only after pushing a pram around and realising how NO ONE moves out of the way for you and how challenging it is, that I've realised how bullish I have to be. I never want to come over as rude as that's just not what I'm like, but I'll always put my baby first :) Yeah though, there are some women out there who really don't care, I've had my heels scraped by prams lots of times and there's never been a 'sorry' from the person pushing it
ReplyDeleteI don't like cyclists on pavements either but being one (!) I just want to explain that for the majority of my journey i am on the road, esp if i don't have my little one on the back but if the road is just not safe enough for cyclists then i mount the curb and am respectful to pedestrians. It's illegal but it's been decriminalized (ie they don't prosecute) because the roads just aren't always the safer option. Eg do you know the road between the BBC and Llandaff Rowing club? That's one where I will often choose pavement over road because it's terrifying. :/
ReplyDeleteI am SOOOOOO with you re the lifts. I have been there with a disabled friend waiting whilst completely child free, able bodied people push in front! Specifically the ones in St Davids 2. I think it attracts ignoramuses!!!! I've quite often shouted about how rude they are! There is an escalator in front of them!!!! Ugh makes me sooooo angry!
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